The name “Kate Spade” refers to both the iconic fashion brand and its founder, but there was much more to the story than one woman.
Elyce Arons is also at the heart of Kate Spade’s history, and she’s telling her side in a new memoir remembering her late friend. “We Might Just Make It After All: My Best Friendship with Kate Spade” is out now from Simon & Schuster.
Arons and Spade met as freshmen at the University of Kansas, later transferring to Arizona State University together, where Spade would meet her husband, Andy Spade (brother of comedian David Spade). The trio cofounded the iconic affordable luxury handbag company together.
Arons and Spade were inseparable for much of their adult lives until Spade died in 2018. In her memoir, Arons includes a letter in which Spade calls her “the first person in my life to really show me how it feels to be truly loved.”
Kate Spade was ‘miserable’ being a public figure
Arons’ memoir chronicles the humble early days of Kate Spade, starting with Spade’s “aha! moment” after she couldn’t find the right handbag for a fashion shoot at her magazine editor job. She and Andy laid the foundations for a new company, then convinced Arons to move back to New York City and join them. Their fledgling company developed out of Spade’s New York apartment, and they partnered with local textiles manufacturers who thought they “were kind of crazy,” Arons writes. When their operation grew too large for Spade’s apartment, they moved to an office and sourced dozens of discarded desks they found on the sidewalk.
None of the early partners were eager to be the brand’s public face, but because Spade – known in her personal life as Katy – had the name on the label, the task went to her.
“Katy never wanted to be the public face of anything. On the contrary, she was apprehensive of fame. But by creating the brand’s aesthetic, she was the designer,” Arons writes. “Despite her shyness, Katy had charisma, authenticity, the look, and the X factor that made her the front person and face of the brand. Her name was on the label. We were happy with it for the most part. The only caveat was our worry for her sake about how reluctant she was to carry our torch.”
Though Arons writes that Spade “persevered and did become an expert at being the company face and voice,” she still struggled with public recognition. She was naturally “slightly introverted” and was uncomfortable with celebrity.
She also often had to travel as the face of the company, going on tour to represent new accessory lines and products. Arons describes this as a “miserable” experience for Spade. When they launched their first perfume, Spade toured alone, eventually confronting Arons in a phone call that she felt “abandoned” by her team.
“I know it’s not your fault that you’re not here, but I feel abandoned by you. You guys got me into this. You should be doing this tour with me,” Spade said, according to Arons.
Elyce Arons’ last conversation with Kate Spade: ‘Inconceivable’
Years after selling their company, Arons and Spade started shoe and purse company Frances Valentine together. Their sales were strong and it looked to Arons like “lightning just might strike twice.”
Spade died a year later.
“I talked often with Katy about her struggle with depression, which I knew she had been dealing with those last few years. She was actively seeking help with specialists, and we understood the goal was to mitigate the times Katy was carrying that deep sadness which she couldn’t seem to shake and had weighed heavily on her in recent years,” Arons writes. “Most of the time she was herself, and we spent our days together as usual working or socializing. We had discussed the suicides of celebrities in the past and she had said definitively to me, ‘I would never, ever do that.’”
Still, Arons says she didn’t know how deep Spade’s depression was. She writes that Spade’s death “left us with many questions.” She had spoken with Spade just the day before about Spade’s summer travel plans when Spade said she had to answer a call from her dad and would call Arons back later. That it would be their last conversation was “inconceivable” to Arons.
“Losing my best friend for life – the woman who shared my sense of humor, who’d been my constant companion at school, at work, at dinners, on the phone, in my house, on vacations – was like losing your face in a mirror,” Arons writes. “It was disconcerting, disturbing and very lonely.”
Kate Spade and husband Andy lived apart but ‘loved each other’
At the time of her death, Spade and her husband had been living apart but just “needed a break” and “never even discussed divorce,” Andy told People in a statement after her death.
In “We Might Just Make it After All,” Arons writes that the pair “loved each other to the ends of the earth.” She also lambasts those who wrote “surface-y, ready-made explanations” for Spade’s death, like marriage or company problems.
“A highly sensitive person, she felt things more deeply than most,” Arons writes. “But I know for sure she was not so upset about how many pairs of shoes we sold that she would take her own life. We all have dark moments and periods. In one of those moments, she lost hope.”
This article discusses suicide and suicidal ideation. If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available. Call or text 988 or chat at 988lifeline.org.
Clare Mulroy is USA TODAY’s Books Reporter, where she covers buzzy releases, chats with authors and dives into the culture of reading. Find her on Instagram, subscribe to our weekly Books newsletter or tell her what you’re reading at cmulroy@usatoday.com.
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